One Man’s Journey

ok… so I’ve not lived the healthiest lifestyle… fattening foods… smoking… drinking… women of questionable morals…

actually that sounds pretty good…

then why do I feel like crap?

I have an appointment tomorrow at the cardiologist.

You would think that something this major would provide it’s own fanfare.

nope, just a couple of geeks on their computers, mildly annoyed that it took this long… cutting into their World of Warcraft time…

• back in the hospital again.. damnit… limited net connection and the filters block me posting to my blog #
• @BrendaBDSM naughty… yeah i guess that’s what’s landed me in the hospital again… but it’s the slaves fault… she gets the spanks in reply to BrendaBDSM #
• @BrendaBDSM still looking for adult web design? DM me with your specific needs. in reply to BrendaBDSM #
• @justenveriato just what a guy sitting in the hospital with lung problems wants to hear, gee thanks in reply to justenveriato #

• sick as a dog thismorning… god I hate cold and flu season #
• plz RT: We have a challenge going to get 100 people into the Un-official Fetlife Chat at one time! http://tinyurl.com/fetlifechat #

• RT @bondageradio Happening Now: Live Chat - Ask Mez - BondageRadio.com Founder answers your questions LIVE
  http://tinyurl.com/fetlifechat #
• @twistedmonk well, we’re glad you could make it in reply to twistedmonk #
• TRACKING #
• Too Cute not to pass along: Getting To Know Your Family And Friends http://bit.ly/GjIKx #
• @mollycrabapple wordpress to a new site… not just a hobby… it’s what i do… your blog? or someone elses? in reply to mollycrabapple #

• ever notice that no matter how early you get up, it’s still MORNING… ugh… need coffee… brb #
• food, or sex… decisions-decisions… hmmmm #
• dont get me wrong… i want food… but that means I have to untie her… then there’s the whole “those cuffs are too tight” argument #
• rt @aagblog ok… too funny… and not funny at the same time http://tinyurl.com/dxny4y #
• Had to remind my girl today, that I never stop, being Master. #Mez #
• @fetlifers Just sitting in the UN-Official #fetlife live chat room waiting for chatters http://fetlife.bondageradio.com #
• @wefollow #Mez #bdsm #Gor #
• @wefollow #Gorean #Fetish #music #
• I’m bored… #
• @allfragments yeah… it’s just you … the rose it’s self says Romance… long stem and thorns says RIGHT NOW! in reply to allfragments #
• @MarketingProfs there’s a linked in plugin for wordpress and you can get the linked in button from thier site http://www.linkedin.com in reply to MarketingProfs #
• @MarketingProfs need account first, under Tools > Overview, get an e-mail signature, its simple HTML -pages, forum signatures, etc. in reply to MarketingProfs #

Get your twitter mosaic here.

And these are the people who think I’m interesting

Get your twitter mosaic here.

• I posted a bunch of photos of me for you ladies to drool over (or laugh at) http://mezentius,evbid.com #
• @MissXena sounds great!… um, while yer up, you can get me one, too. in reply to MissXena #
• @BDSMwebmaster Let us know how that goes. Might be something #bondageradio would be interested in for DJ shows. in reply to BDSMwebmaster #
• @bondageradio @fetlifers Just wanted to make sure people knew about the UN-offical FetLife Chat http://fetlife.bondageradio.com #
• @smuttysteff v. the French Press - I know who I’m cheering for! GO GET’EM! in reply to smuttysteff #
• Just updated my follower count (now 84!) on TwitterCounter: http://twittercounter.com/jarlmezentius #
• here’s the real question, Are you following me because you want to, or because you have to? #
• Sitting back… thinking up ways to train my slaves for next week… What are you doing? #
• RT @lovefrommom New blog post: Awesome Feather Paintings http://tinyurl.com/c7uhd3 #
• @KellyKB Hows it working for ya? in reply to KellyKB #
• @KellyKB I use twitterific it uses the spell check built into MacOSX in reply to KellyKB #
• @KellyKB Adobe AIR has a way of really chewing up CPU power. I need the whole CPU for all the audio and web editing I do. in reply to KellyKB #
• @KellyKB no. it’s free but your right, there’s no PC version, only Mac
  there is a PC clone, cant remember what the name is tho in reply to KellyKB #
• @ScarletLotus Starch Overload… on the no carb diet and you’re killing me… gawd I want bread in reply to ScarletLotus #
• @robchristensen in 140 char? LOL … the high CPU stuff is nicecast, Photoshop, iTunes (24/7), FireFox, etc. in reply to robchristensen #
• @robchristensen (cont) and lets not forget Skype, Audacity, iPhoto, GrageBand, Adium and ecto in reply to robchristensen #
• @KellyKB @biadventuress @bondageradio just a few of my favorite followers - #FollowFriday in reply to KellyKB #
• damn… everyone went to sleep on me #
• cash4gold - FAIL ten cents on the dollar gold value. don’t believe the tv ads #
• damn… DSL is spotty at best… now the Sat Dish is kicking off in the wind. #
• why do imoprtant long phone calls only come when you have no charge on your phone? #
• The probability of any unfortunate event occurring is inversely proportionate to its desirability. - Prof. Murphy #
• Beauty, Class and a sence of humor @HisButterfly for #FollowFriday - rt ths pls #
• @HisButterfly see… classy… in reply to HisButterfly #
• @CatalinaLoves Keep up with the no smoking, you’ll feel better. but for god’s sake, dont be a smoke nazi - #smokenazi in reply to CatalinaLoves #
• adult bloggers out there: Blogger, Live Journal or Wordpress? what’s your choice? #
• angel made a late lunch. we’re eating a creamy chicken soup with long grain rice. she is sitting quietly at my feet. My girl loves me. #Mez #
• @Jasmin_Norris 19… I held on. in reply to Jasmin_Norris #
• @guycodemagazine Can a mans balls get Tangled? Yes. Is the reason we don’t try to jump over barbed wire. Switch Places? Depends on her skilz in reply to guycodemagazine #
• @tylertorment One must master themselves before they can Master another. Rage is a lack of self control. Dont get mad, get even. in reply to tylertorment #
• @Jasmin_Norris Hey… you followed me first. I’m just sitting here (drooling) studying fem sub photos for my blog posts. in reply to Jasmin_Norris #
• #FollowFriday @bondageradio @KellyKB @HisButterfly @urban_gypsy @smuttysteff @Jasmin_Norris #
• @bondageradio Tag, you’re it! - Come play at http://bit.ly/Tvlf #
• @guycodemagazine Does that make it a Skilz-Saw? in reply to guycodemagazine #
• RT @Graydancer: So many frakkin’ memories in this town - sorta makes you pray for Alsheimers, don’t it… #
• MaleDoms: How do you handle this? A friend of my girl, a male sub, asked if I would be his Master - I’m Strait - #BDSM #Feish #Mez #
• @twistedmonk awww, I wantz a minion… I Can Has Minion? in reply to twistedmonk #
• @MrSocial Oh God I know this… not going to say… just going to go quietly commit suicide… #triviafriday in reply to MrSocial #
• @smuttysteff He’s Jewish. How much guilt can you handle? in reply to smuttysteff #
• I’ll find the handcuff keys in a minute. I want to see the last episode of #BattlestarGalactica - #bdsm #buzzkill #FAIL #
• @molten_emotion The boy’s relationship to His master is almost always about service and not sex. the exercise tho was a test of Dom honor in reply to molten_emotion #
• NEWS: ok this is funny right here, - FLORIDA COURT SETS ATHEIST HOLY DAY http://lovemom.evbid.com/?p=1028 #
• @mollycrabapple OK… I give up trying to figure it out… WTF is #SXSW ????????????? in reply to mollycrabapple #
• I’m thinking it has something to do with Sexy Single Women… but I see sooo many DUDES typing #sxsw it makes me wonder #
• This is a post on my girls blog-Moving Forward http://shadi.bondageradio.com/?p=146 #mez #
• @mollycrabapple oh… I liked my definition better #sxsw = SeXy Single Women … just wish the dudes would stop posting in reply to mollycrabapple #
• Just updated @bondageradio ’s follower count (now 653!) on TwitterCounter: http://twittercounter.com/bondageradio #
• writing a review on wordpress blog tools Tweet This & Twitter Tools for Adult Bloggers on @bondageradio #
• someone please tell me what i’m doing here at o’god-early on a sunday… and bring coffee #
• @writingdirty nothing says geek, like tweeting fandom at DrWho in reply to writingdirty #

They say Integrity is what you do when no one’s watching. But can you ever know when no one is watching?

As a Gorean Master, it’s my job to always watch, understand, and learn. The looks, the glances that my girls receive as we go about our day are the keen eye of a trained observer, watching, measuring, absorbing.

It’s not just my girls, but others as well, both in and outside of the lifestyle.

A friend, and I use the term loosely, was in trouble and was almost literally begging me to help bail him out, again. This friend was always in some sort of trouble or another and he had nearly bankrupted his father in court costs, bail, and lawyers fees.

I put the situation out in the open and outlined his options, all of them legal, and plainly asked him a simple question, “What does your gut tell you to do?”

My heart sank as he came up with the only option I hadn’t mentioned, the only illegal option he could have chosen. I was not surprised however. He had his options, and tried to bypass the consequences of his actions. I had bailed him out for the last time, because, for the first time, truly I had a measure of his integrity.

Back to the subject of this blog; my girls, or in this case, my potential boy. Don’t get all homophobic on me, I’m strait, so gay sex is not a possibility, but the possibility of owning a male slave is. I have owned boys before, but always had a Domme partner at those times. This is the first time I’ve ever had a boy beg for my collar, when I didn’t have a strong woman on my arm (so to speak).

He was respectful, he waited until everyone was well out of hearing range before he asked, and he asked with his eyes down not presenting a challenge, but an expression of a desire to serve.

Although I have known this boy for a while, I have never directly measured his integrity. From what I know of his choices in the past, he has displayed an unfortunate lack of situational awareness, but nothing to indicate a lack of moral fortitude.

I know what my answer is, and it doesn’t have anything to do with his moral fiber, but I put the question out there for the Dom’s reading this blog, “What would you do? What measure would you put into your decision where sex is a non-issue, only service?”

think about it quietly, there is no requirement to answer, but think about your answer, what would you do? Then sit back and measure your answer against the fact that; “No one was watching.”

Thanks to a couple ideas from friends (who also talked me into joining twitter, even after my last post about the subject) I’ve been given my own Hashtag #Mez for posting tweets relating to my blog or BDSM / Dominance / slave training.

Angel thinks this is a bad idea. It just feeds my already unbearable ego. I think it’s just perfectly appropriate.

Twitter does an effective job at communicating bits of info to friends but it’s the add on tools that make it worth while. Separating the lines of information out into “Searchable” information. Trivia really, but at 140 characters at a time.

Life is trivia. @Catalina is quitting smoking and is too damned cheerful about it. @amethyst1 is moving in a few days, we’re gonna miss her online till she gets setup again. @TwistedMonk still makes some of the best bondage rope in the business, wonder what the next Color of the Month is going to be?

Trivia about my life? Well I guess you’re just gonna have to follow @JarlMezentius or use the add ons to search for #Mez. But then again, you could just read my blog. What a concept.